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Being, nothingness and @FloridaMan

Some time back, my friend Amanda sent me Buzzfeed’s wrapup of “The 40 Most Insane Things That Happened In Florida In 2012.” I replied that, technically, only 38 of the items qualified as “insane.” Firstly, Busch Gardens is the greatest theme park on the planet (safari! phenomenal rides! and free beer!), and tiger tug-o-war is…

Baby, you’re SMOKIN’!

You ever have those moments when you question whether despite the hip-high stack of parenting books you’ve read, or all the research into products, or all the money you dump into preschool, or all the organic foods you buy, or all the countless thousands of hours of thoughtful nurturing and caregiving, you’re STILL fucking up…

Ladies, kindly STFU already.

As most people close to me know, I have a verrrry testy relationship with marriage. Some aspects of deeply trouble me: its religious foundations, its patriarchal history of a woman being ceded by one man to another, even — I’ll admit it — its permanence. For me, marriage represents a certain end to a narrative…

Dear Alanis Morissette

I know you took a lot of crap over “Isn’t it Ironic,” crap you altogether deserved what with the irony of English teachers quoting your lyrics, and those were lyrics that revealed you to be COMPLETELY OBLIVIOUS TO THE DEFINITION OF IRONY. But on the unexpected chance you haven’t since cracked an English Grammar for…

A thousand words of YAYYY!!!

I don’t know what’s better — the news that researchers found an enormous population of western lowland gorillas in Congo previously believed to have been critically endangered, or this accompanying New York Times photo: I mean, how ridiculously awesome is that baby gorilla? She’s all, “That’s right, bitches, we’re back! And check these chest-thump skillz!”…