Or as Uncle Daron said of the 8-year-old, “She wanted BLACK Chucks? Uh oh, she’s gonna be that girl.”
Mommy’s lil shredders.
Sundays at the skatepark. All that organic food and Montessori, just to end up with a pair of hardened street punks.
Countdown to sibling warfare in 3, 2…
The best Japanese gummies on the planet flank the 10-year-old’s first chibi commission.
I’m not the only sucker for this, right?
Is it humanly possibly to say no to this? It’s like Machiavelli disguised as a baby bunny, the manipulation is so pwecious and adowwabow!
Hand signals for outsmarting Mama and Dada.
We save these found treasures in the archives for them. “The greatest victory is that which requires no battle.” ? Sun Tzu, The Art of War
My kid, the Bartleby of colorers.
Restaurant dining calls for nonviolent resistance.
Not available in your grocer’s deli
Michael: “What the hell is ‘v-a-j’?” Me: “Stop playing dumb, you can’t expect a five-year-old to be a perfect speller. Obviously, she’s asking for some old vadge.” Michael: “I’m really disappointed in that spelling.” Me: “Frankly, I’d always thought fresh was preferred. I’m just relieved to discover there’s a market for the well-seasoned vadge. Tick-tock,…
The nail in my future PTA presidency coffin
Eliot’s in kindergarten now, and while elementary school is worlds more rigidly structured than preschool, hers does allow for a certain amount of scheduled collective whimsy, in the form of the “(Fill-in-the-Blank) Day.” They’ve had Pajama Day, Wacky Hair Day, and today, the long-awaited Crazy Mustache Day. I figured we needed a mustache, and we…
Baby, you’re SMOKIN’!
You ever have those moments when you question whether despite the hip-high stack of parenting books you’ve read, or all the research into products, or all the money you dump into preschool, or all the organic foods you buy, or all the countless thousands of hours of thoughtful nurturing and caregiving, you’re STILL fucking up…
Her limerick was filthier
So in a moment alone together the other night, the four-year-old pipes up with a fragment of her latest mental gymnastics: “Mama! ‘Bell’ rhymes with ‘HELL’!!” Precious, am I right?! I mean, that’s one adorable plate-load of Sugar/Spice/Nice© we’ve got right there! (And I wonder why none of the other preschool Mommies will talk to…